A recent USA Today article discusses the growing trend for couples to separate amicably. The article cites a number of reasons for this shift, from couples having watched their parents and friends go through messy divorces to wanting children of the marriage to have the easiest transition possible.

For couples seeking to split on friendly terms Collaborative Divorce may be their best option. Collaborative Divorce has a number of benefits, but its focus on minimizing conflict between the parties is probably its greatest benefit for couples who want to continue a positive relationship after the divorce is finalized. The unique strcuture of a Collaborative Divorce proceeding incentives completion of the process. In a Collaborative Divorce the parties sign a participation agreement at the outset. The Participation Agreement sets the terms for the Collaborative Law process. By signing, the parties agree that if either party withdraws from the process and proceeds to litigation, they are barred from using the services of any of the professionals involved in the Collaborative process, including their attorney. The participation agreement also commits the parties to providing full and honest disclosure. The participation agreement lays the ground rules for the process and encourages the parties to see it through.

Collaborative Divorce differs from mediation, another divorce solution mentioned in the USA Today article, in many ways. In a Collaborative Divorce each party is represented by their own attorney. Attorneys must be familiar with the process, and able to represent the best interest of their client while staying in a collaborative mindset and focusing on issue resolution. Attorneys representing clients in a mediation are likely still in an adversarial mindset. Attorneys in a Collaborative Divorce should be trained in Collaborative principals and able to shift their perspective towards conflict resolution. Unlike a mediation, in a Collaborative Divorce, mutually agreed upon financial and mental health professionals assist the couple in working through issues that arise. The Collaborative process sets the tone for working through issues together and will hopefully allow couples to continue that cooperation on issues that arive after the divorce is finalized. 

John Jarvis and his former wife are great examples of this trend.  After a mediated divorce, he now stays in his former wife's guest room when he comes to visit his 13 year old daughter, an arrangement that gives him more time with his daughter and costs him less so he can visit more frequently. 

The number of mediated and collaborative divorces seems to be rising.  John Zarzynski, who co-founded Agreement House in Arizona says that when he started, mediated cases were rare. Ten years ago, he mediated about a dozen a year; last year, that number was 75.

As people seek out alternatives to the traditional courtroom divorce, Collaborative Law is an increasingly popular option for people who hope to maintain a positive relationship with their former spuse after the divorce is finalized.